Defining YOUR own success

Top of the hour, to everyone!

I hope that everyone had a restful weekend and the week is looking promising.  Thank you to

everyone who read the post on listening to your inner voice.  I am so humbled to hear that it spoke to so many of you.  That is the point of Lo's Notes, it is meant to encourage and have you to either continue or create the life you were born to live.

A psychologist friend of mine asked me, "what does success look like to me? " At that time I had really been working at what success looks like for ME.  It looks different for everyone.  I wanted to clearly define it for myself because I always wanted to be in a place of growth and peace around success.

I replied to her questions with, " success to me is when I love what I do, I can share it with others, and I can replicate it."  Once you define what success looks like for you, you can stop making other people's meaning of success dictate your life and this perfectionist syndrome which has defined your view of success.

This week everyone has a homework assignment from me. Journal what your definition of success is to YOU.

Then, share what success looks like for you  with me and the people in your inner circle.   Remember success is not about balancing everything, no one is looking for wonder woman or superman. Success is about the journey and less about the destination.  

Til next time, remember to live, love & share. 

Peace, blessing and much success (the way you define it)!

Lo--

Our Godmother said it best.  Don't you think?

Your Inner Voice is CALLING On YOU!

Hey My Loves,

It has been a while since I have written on Lo's Notes. I want to drop some knowledge that will hopefully leave you to listen to your inner voice and step outside your comfort zone.

At an early age we are taught not to trust people, places, things, and most tragically our heart's. Unfortunately sooner then later this leads to self doubt.

It's time to start listening to your  inner voice. Fear will drown your dreams and kill your decisions.
I am sure most of us wants to know how to begin to learn how to trust our inner voice.  Here are two things I want to leave you with:

      1. In spite of all your challenges and convictions of not being where you want to be, or having certain things , God's got your back!  He watches over you. There is nothing to big or small for God. 

         2.  Remember that it is your decisions and not your conditions that determines your destination. Move fearlessly in faith. Remember that when opportunity meets preparation, those are two ingredients for success.  

Beloved, take time this week and next to journal about the one thing that you are afraid to face. I challenge you to conquer your hesitation and listen to that repeated tug on your heart.  That is your inner voice.  

It is time to surrender and trust God to take you to the places you ought to be and surrounded by the people that will encourage you.

If this sounds like you, then I want you to share with me how you will begin to listen to your inner voice, that tug at your heart.

Til next time.  Remember to live, love & share.

LO

       Ps. Every time you compromise or settle for less then, you always get far less then you desire (wink).  

Get out of your own way

I am really growing all.  I don't remember when I realized this but I started to become really conscious of the fact that I talk myself out of my blessings (raise your hand if this is you).  What I mean by this is that I would say, "if it does not work at least I tried" or "if I don't get it now may be later".

God does not give you the idea without Him seeing you through.  He provides a way when there is non.  He will send the right people alongside you.

So why do we default to blocking our blessings?  Most people let fear of the unknown talk them out of their blessings. Any time you have an "if" when pursing your purpose you negate your blessings.  You are no longer living in creativity but now you are living in doubt.

I can find very many examples in my own life were I have allowed fear to derail me from being creative and experience joy in my pursuit of my purpose.  In essence you are either in fear or in faith. God does not give you the spirit of fear.  When pursing your dreams it requires faith.


When we pursue whatever God as called us to do, it is our outward expression of our trust in God.  When you fear you are saying you don't trust Him.

What is one area in your life you have talked yourself out of your blessings?

I pray this post leaves you to live, love and share over the weekend!

See you next week.

LO

#Dear Self....

My bestie has an idea for a book that she is working on, a single lady's guide for living and dating in your 30's.  We were chatting it up over cocktails and food, while she was educating me on what it is like being single in NYC.  I can't wait for her book to be publish and I hope she graces us with some of her wisdom in a future post.  Over our third drink and lots of laughs I asked her what she would  tell her young self about love?  What she would tell her older self about love?

Here is what she would say to her younger self:
 Date more for fun and have more relationship experiences, not always looking for every man to be the one.
To her older self:
Look at what new experiences you can have or what you can learn.  Instead of focusing on where it is going.  

I paused and I thought about it and here is what I would tell my younger self about love:

Date. Don't be a stranger to going out and have fun.  Travel and find love in a foreign country over pasta and wine.
To my older self I would say:

Laugh a lot with your love, stay home on rainy days and eat ice-cream and watch a movie and always take turns speaking.

Leave a comment for me and tell me what you would tell your younger self about love?  What would you tell your older self about love? I look forward to reading them.  

See you next time on Thursday.  Remember to take the time to live, love & share.  

xo,

LO--

Forgiving Yourself

Top of the hour!  I pray that everyone is having a great week.  If not, and the week has presented some bumps or challenges remember to pray.  Call on something Higher then yourself, call on your Creator.

A couple of weeks ago, I could not seem to figure out life.  It just seemed as if nothing and everything was going wrong at work.  You ever have one of those days?  I had a big task at work that needed a keen eye and I was on a time crunch.  Well, the work I produced did not turn out to my standards or my boss's standards either.  He did not need to beat me up because I did a great job of that myself.  I was basically in my feelings and I felt bad and embarrassed.  There was noting that my friends and family could have said because I felt like a "fuck-up".  I even asked God, "why?"  What lesson did He want me to  learn?  I could not get pass the embarrassment of messing up to clearly learn anything.  It took me a few days to finally quiet the talk in my head to distinguish between the facts and what seemed to be the truth.  When I was able to quiet down and start the healing process (after beating myself up) I started to learn from my experience.  One particular lesson is that I don't work well under pressure.  I learned that I have to plan ahead.  When I have to do things last minute or rush  I don't produce my best work.  

Second, I am learning that the brain/mind is a muscle.  I have to constantly condition and work with this muscle for it  be strong and healthy.  I am a big believer in positive reinforcement.  Praying, reading positive quotes and articles.  Repeating over and over in the morning, that "today is going to be a good day" or "Greater  is He who is in me then He who is in the world." I was polluting my muscle with negative things after I messed up, so I started to see the world as me being a "fuck up" and all I do is "fuck up some shit up".  That is not true and I am not owning that.  

Third, I am learning that we can not dodge making mistakes.  I read this quote on good old Instagram, "you might never fail on the scale I did, but some failures in life is inevitable.  It is impossible to live without failing at something, unless you live so cautiously that you might as well not have lived at all-in which case, you fail by default".  This blog is about encouraging you to LIVE!  So, living means that you are going to make mistakes.  I was so wrapped up in my mistakes that I did not realize that mistakes are apart of growth.  Evaluated mistakes lead to growth.   

Once I calmed down after the week's events I was able to see and understand what I was suppose to learn.    I read Elizabeth Gilbert's post on Facebook about self-forgiveness which  resonated with me:

"You'll never untangle the circumstances that brought you to this moment. But you are a warrior. Arise now, like a warrior. You are caught up in circumstances that God determined for you. Stand up and do your duty."

Such beautiful words of self-forgiveness!

The truth is that sometimes we find ourselves standing in predicaments that we simply cannot fix or untangle — or even begin to understand.

Sometimes we caused those predicaments; sometimes they were inflicted upon us; sometimes it's a mixture of both.

Sometimes, nothing can be done but to forgive ourselves for our own hopeless predicament (which invariably leads us to forgive others for THEIR hopeless predicaments) and then...arise.

Forgive, arise, and try again — humbled, but wiser.

Onward,
LG

So, my loves, remember to press your feet firmly on the ground and like LG said, it best: "forgive, arise, and try again--humbled, but wiser".  Isn't that what life is about remembering to live, love, and share!

See you next week!  Bigger and better because your are going to arise and try again. 

Love, 

LO--

wants vs.wishes

The journey continues y'all.  I have been off the scene for a minute now and a friend recently reminded me about all the great post I shared.  Plus, she mentioned my journey.  In less then a week we will be half way through the year. Friends and I sat around the grill talking about this year's life

lessons.  This group was not shy of expressing the highs and lows of half the year.  IT's NOT OVER!  That is what we all agreed about.  The best is yet to come.  What I noticed is that all of us had goals and ambitions that we were ready to put to the the test.

So enough catching up and on to the lesson!  Jack Canfield, the author of Chicken Soup for the Soul posted  his 101 Lifetime Goals "list". The list consisted of all the things he wanted to accomplished in his life.    See below are some of what is on his list.  The bold items are things he as already accomplished.

Personal Achievements

51. Appear on the Phil Donahue Show (deleted because it is no longer airing, but I have appeared on the Larry King Show, Fox and Friends, The Today Show and Good Morning America, as well as more than 100 other television shows and more than 700 radio shows)

52. Appear on the Oprah Winfrey Show

53. Write a best selling book (61 best-sellers so far)

54. Make one million dollars in one year ($20 million best year so far, plus $20 million one year when we sold one of my companies)

55. Golf 18 holes under 90 (Deleted due to ruptured disc)

56. Run a 10k race

57. Run 14 miles in less than 3 hours

58. Meet a U.S. president while he/she is still in office (I had lunch at the White House but President Bush was traveling in Texas)

59. Build or buy my dream house

60. Own a vacation home in Hawaii

61. Own my own pool table

His list got me thinking about wants vs. wishes.  Do we really know what we want?  Are we clear that what we want takes persistence?  Our wishes are those things we give little effort to and it would make things a little more comfortable.  Think about it, you say it all the time, "I wish I could afford those Louboutin's in every color". "I wish I could win the Mega Millions,  it would change everything".  Little effort.

I want to start my own list.  Starting your list and writing it down gives it power. The clique saying, "out of sight, out of mind", is so true.  If you don't write it down and see it and review it, and study it, then it just becomes another wish.

Here is the outline to making your wants:

                                                1. you decide what exactly you want 

                                                2. you write it down 

                                                3. make a plan

                                                4. you have to take action on the plan

                                                5. you create benchmarks along the way 

You can wish for a baggin' body and it will only remain a wish until you decided that you want to live a healthy life.  Here is an example: you determined exactly how much you want to lose.  Then, you write it down.  You make plan to start.  You start to workout and eat healthy daily.  You meet with a trainer, you join a gym, and you buy healthy foods.  Along the way you weigh yourself at the 3 week mark of working out, you might even make the workout a little more harder along the way.  Looking at this example also reminds me that your list is a process.

So, I don't want y'all to just read this post, I want you to challenge yourself to think about your own list and create what you want.  Get a journal and start creating your list!  It does not have to be 101, but what every it is let it be your ultimate best and commit to it.  I am working on my list and will share my list with you in the future.  In the meantime, start your list.  We only get better when we remember to live, love and share.  Share your list with me and we can hold each other accountable.

I look forward to seeing you again on Thursday (teaching/sharing with you is on my list).


Lo,
xo

New Year. New Lessons.

I am sure this post will find everyone working hard.  Back to the hustle and bustle.  Back on your grind, and back to living and defining your life's purpose.  Here are a couple of takeaways from 2014 to remember and bring into 2015.  Here we go!

# 5 - Stop thinking you have to wait until January 1st to set new goals and live them out.  Successful people understand that it is not an annual process it is a daily process. You should be more concerned about how you hold yourself accountable on a day to day bases.

# 4 - Sacrificing- Many of us do not want to put in the muscle work to sacrifice.  We must note that there is no achievement without sacrifice.  For example, I have been talking about running a 5k to damn long. I want to be strong and fit but for too long I have not put in the work to achieve my goal. I must start now to achieve my goal.  All small efforts compound for the achievement of my desired goal.  So whatever, you are committing to in 2015, start now, start slow but be consistent.

# 3 - Renewing your mind!  I wrote a blog post awhile back about making it a habit to renew your mind.  You must be intentional to cultivate your happiness.  It takes work and it is a process for the right mindset.

# 2 - Remembering to have gratitude.  The only way you can express gratitude to another person is being intentional about it and knowing what you are grateful for.  Take the time everyday to recognize the people and life's little treasures.  I recommend starting a gratitude journal.

# 1- Remembering to take time to live, love and share.  That means, laughing more, being grateful,    giving more and being a better version of yourself daily.

I look forward to hearing from you on what lessons you plan to take with you this year!

See  you again real soon.

LO,
xo