|The students got a chance to slim me for the science fair!|
Life is ever evolving and I believe that I was created to create. I have been teaching for 7 years and I began teaching after graduate school. I was really looking forward to working in a museum, because I wanted to be around curators, and artists. Despite my efforts, I had a really difficult time breaking into that industry.
I was approached by a family friend to be a substitute teacher and I quickly took on this challenge. Teaching now became my love and passion. Even though I was a sub, I had my own subject, roster of students, classroom, and full-time duties of a teacher. That first year of teaching, my idea of teaching changed needless to say. I had imagined that I was going to wear a dashiki, read Malcolm X, and go to museums once a month. Reality quickly set in. I had to change my attitude and approach to teaching quickly.
One day my principal came to me and asked how comfortable I would feel to teach science in addition to me already teaching history. I remember in college struggling with basic biology. I asked her if I could think about it, and her reply was a sharp, “no”. I smiled and humbly said, “okay”. That night I went to Barnes and Noble to pick up every science book that was ever written to brush up on middle school science. My family thought I was crazy for teaching in the hood and on top of the stories that I came home with about parents, children, and adults, now I wanted to teach science!?
I made it through my first year with a great teacher mentor, a couple of mental bruises about teaching, and physical bruises for breaking up fights in the classroom between students, and this new passion to be a great teacher! Anytime I told someone where I taught you would have thoughtI was a saint or wore a wonder woman belt. The reactions of me teaching in an urban area (I am going to keep it real -- the hood) was interesting. It was as if education should look different there, or only the brave and crazy taught in the hood. I did not have the "lets save the black children" mentality or feel like I wore the “S” on my shirt. I did, however, feel like the black children that looked like me desired a world class education. I also understood that I needed to build trust between the community (group of kids and parents) I was teaching in and to trust that I could do this job.
Since I turned 31, life has a way of starting to look different (well for me at least). I started to reflect more, and ask myself questions like: Am I living my purpose? Do I react accordingly to whatever conflict? Where do I see myself 5 years from now? I started to feel like I was waking up to make it through another day and not really living life! I wanted much more out of my own life. I wanted to start to answer these questions. I also for a period of time felt guilty about life because I felt like, I was so blessed why did I want more from life (that's a whole other blog post). I realized that it was not my job that was the problem but it was that God was preparing me! For what, I am not quit sure yet. I truly believe that nothing happens by mistake. For so long I have been in a place of running, going, trying to get through another day and week and I forgot to listen to God. I needed to start to slow down and be one with my Creator so I can create. I am working on that. Lo’s Notes is one result out of listening and speaking to God.
I have been going through a transformation, and it has not been an easy transformation. I have been pushing myself to really seek and grow. I have learned that a positive attitude, prayer, surrounding yourself with good people, crying a little followed by lots of laughs are important. I am leaving my current job to have more time to LIVE my purpose. For the past year and half I was wondering what the hell was wrong with me? It was not only the fact that I was getting older, it was the fact that I was shifting and becoming more clear on what was important, what I was going to tolerate, and who I want to be in the world.
After 7 years of teaching in the classroom, I begin this new chapter in my life. I know that I will encounter challenges, love, fear, and new perspective. I also bring with me on this new journey God, love, friendships, family, and a peace of mind.
I pray this post leaves you to live, love and share.
Till next time,